OIAP OR NOT?

sigh. somebody please tell me what to do. its like decided already then change and change and change! i wanna go for the experience and the kind of exposure i can get there and learn. but you see, its really stepping outta my whole comfort zone.

is like all the close ones are miles apart from you. friends and family are all very far! things are not that bad if i can get to go with eve. if different how? sigh. gotta really rely on myself. a challenge that really stretches my limit.

i understand, i really do understand how much you've put in and the hurt you've got from the past r/s. you can have all the time to recover. yes, i'll be there for you. lets jiayou together bah. (:

Someone please slap me and kill me cos i dont know what decision to make. I am so so so indecisive right now in this moment. So much to think about and so much to consider.

Bye.